My Top 5 list of Don'ts in Dating

I could share more like 50 don'ts in the the dating world, mainly because I have probably done them all at one point or another, but I like to keep a little mystery going so I will keep it to 5.

1. Don't post your feelings about a guy on Social Media sites until there is a ring.

Some time ago I met a guy online who was seriously handsome. After some time of chatting back and forth, he asked me out. I felt a wee bit overwhelmed going into the date, but I figured I could match his attractiveness with my cute factor and great sense of humor.. ;) So fast forward and we are on the date. The date is going really well in my eyes and we are getting along fabulously. As the date concluded I felt pretty comfortable that we had both had enjoyed the evening and a second date would follow. I said goodbye and went into my apartment excited to talk to my roommates about my evening. After talking to them, I did what any giddy female would do.... I posted that I had a great time on my Facebook status.


Many of you will read this and think the same thing that I did...what's the harm in posting that you had a good time? Well, come to find out from the guy himself that after seeing that, he got nervous about asking me out again. WT?!! Serious? I was perplexed and sought some understanding and to my surprise, it seems my "innocent" statement of having fun made him feel like I was too eager. So, to this day, while I personally don't see what the big deal was, I am going to go with his response and say, keep your elations to yourself in the beginning.



2. Don't think you are in a commited exclusive relationship after one or even two dates.

I was having a conversation with a guy about this particular topic. He said that he hated dating because he felt women expected him to make a decision about how he felt about them within 2 weeks of meeting. He said it was ridiculous and way too much pressure. I have to agree with him on this, but let's face it, there is a huge majority of us who have done just that. I know you could all share stories of meeting someone and having a great connection and thinking, why do we need to look any further...we found each other!! Well it seems like this is a huge don't, no matter how electric the first or even second meeting is. The key here is take it slowly. If it was meant to be, taking your time can only be to your benefit.

3. Don't share EVERYTHING about yourself too soon.

It can be a little overwhelming to an individual to hear your entire life story including family feuds, medical history and any other intimate details, during the initial phase of dating. I'm not saying that they should never be shared, but baby steps people, baby steps.

4. Don't feel entitled to know the schedule or whereabouts of the person you just met.

I know that we all risk getting hurt when we put our emotions on the table. I also know that we eventually want to be able to trust the person we are in a relationship with. But that is the key, we should first be in an exclusive relationship before we start quizzing each other on who they were talking to on the phone with all night. A good friend told me that trust isn't something that is automatic. If he wants a girl to trust him, he will be trusting and make sure that she feels she can trust him, but only when he wants to be exclusive. I tend to agree with him on that. Just going out with someone once doesn't mean they should stop talking to every other guy and girl. Wait till there is a mutual agreement.

5. And finally, don't assume that because you have been on a couple dates, that you are Dating.

This one is a biggie and I'm afraid, I have broken a few times...hey I'm learning this stuff too! Anyway, I have come to realize that we automatically say we are dating someone when it is still in the early stages, thus confusing yourself and those around you. Let me define, if you are dating someone, you and the other person are either exclusive or on the road to exclusivity, otherwise, you should just state that you two have gone out (insert amount of times here). I know it is exciting to be able to tell friends and family that you are dating someone, but once again, there should be a mutual agreement in place.

So there you have it, Erin's Top 5 Don'ts. So what are some of your don'ts? I would love to hear your stories.

Next up... Top 5 Do's in Dating..